balancing excitement through the perfect truth of His Word

This is totally the time of year that people think ahead; plan things; make changes for the new year ahead. But what about me? What can I plan for? Did my planning bring me to where I am now? Surely not. 2011 has been all about the Lord showing me how He is sovereign. And again I have relearned that He is good.

But boy, I have felt the sting of disappointment when I try to rush things. And then I relearn that His timing is perfect. That His ways are higher for my best and His glory! I must hold to that. So do I let myself feel glimpses of what may be in this new year? 100% support? Leaving family and friends indefinitely? Packing my world into a 62 inch suitcase? To a place I may make a new life? Plane rides? Separating myself from my babies? Do I let myself imagine the emotions? Plan scenarios? Would you? Can I stop it? It sure is hard... but this is where I find myself. It's a really really delicate balance of excitement versus reality.

So what am I to do with my wondering thoughts and perplexing plans? All I can do it focus myself into His Word. Again. That is all I have. I can't plan what will be. The simple truth is that I can't even know what the next minute will hold. I am clueless. Totally clueless. But He is not:

' "Though the mountains be shaken
   and the hills be removed,
yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken
   nor my covenant of peace be removed,”
   says the LORD, who has compassion on you.' Isaiah 54:10 NIV

"The LORD Himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deut 31:8 NIV

' "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." ' Jeremiah 29:11

"For I am about to do something new.
      See, I have already begun! Do you not see it?
   I will make a pathway through the wilderness.
      I will create rivers in the dry wasteland." Isaiah 43:19 NLT