obviously
I have been begging God to share some sort of huge enlightenment with me regarding our home, current living situation, raising support, waiting for provision for airfare, tackling the ever-so daunting daily task of home schooling, and the emotional state of feeling trapped in this place. Begging, you say? Yes, begging! To the point of fighting tears (even now).
The song "Change My Life" by Ashes Remain has become my new theme song for this time in my life. Here are a few of the lyrics:
"I'm crying out
'I need a miracle!'
If you could make the sun burn through the night
And you could make the dead man come alive
If you could make the oceans all run dry
Then I know that you can change my life
I know you can change me life"
Powerful words, huh? This is exactly what my heart has been screaming to God for the past few weeks. 'Make this end! Change these situations. I know you can!' It just seems that whatever He is accomplishing (yes, there is a reason for my circumstances) - He means them for good.
Anyhow. What I wanted to accomplish with this post is that God has answered me. Sure enough. Not in a billowing cloud. Not in a crazy dream. Not with a personal teacher for each of the four grade levels... not with a maid or live-in chef. And nope, not even with a big fat check in our bank account for airfare. (Though He has in the past provided for miraculous deposits!) He has answered me - just not in the way that I wanted. (However, this is a fabulous thing that I am not in charge!) He has answered none the least. Here is what He has told me over the past week or so:
"My God will come through always. Always." ~ song from the Easter cantata at Woodhaven Baptist Church
"Don't quit." ~ Alan Harveston
"When everything around you seems to be going wrong, and you are just tired of trying, whisper these four words, "I trust you, Jesus." Let me take care of you." ~ Jade's devotional (Jesus Calling for kids)
"Don't despair today when you can't see it. Obey God and trust that He is working. His timing is so rarely house, but it is always perfect. Instead of chaffing under the seemingly mundane, embrace each task as a building block for the dreams in your heart. Don't give up home. I promise.... it's coming." ~ Proverbs 31 Ministry's author Amy Carroll
His answer is not the one I wanted. Of course we live in society that demands instant gratification, and as a pathetic human sometimes I would like to put my God in a box and apply this part of our culture to His personality. Praise the Lord!!! My God is so much bigger than my society. He knows what is best, and though it hurts worse than I could ever imagine anything... His answer is this:
"Hang On. Don't give up. Don't quit. Keep pressing on."
"So let's not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good. At the right time we will harvest a good crop if we don't give up, or quit." Galatians 6:9 The Message
And by the way, just so you know... I have applied this answer to my blogging issue as well. :) Obviously.
The song "Change My Life" by Ashes Remain has become my new theme song for this time in my life. Here are a few of the lyrics:
"I'm crying out
'I need a miracle!'
If you could make the sun burn through the night
And you could make the dead man come alive
If you could make the oceans all run dry
Then I know that you can change my life
I know you can change me life"
Powerful words, huh? This is exactly what my heart has been screaming to God for the past few weeks. 'Make this end! Change these situations. I know you can!' It just seems that whatever He is accomplishing (yes, there is a reason for my circumstances) - He means them for good.
Anyhow. What I wanted to accomplish with this post is that God has answered me. Sure enough. Not in a billowing cloud. Not in a crazy dream. Not with a personal teacher for each of the four grade levels... not with a maid or live-in chef. And nope, not even with a big fat check in our bank account for airfare. (Though He has in the past provided for miraculous deposits!) He has answered me - just not in the way that I wanted. (However, this is a fabulous thing that I am not in charge!) He has answered none the least. Here is what He has told me over the past week or so:
"My God will come through always. Always." ~ song from the Easter cantata at Woodhaven Baptist Church
"Don't quit." ~ Alan Harveston
"When everything around you seems to be going wrong, and you are just tired of trying, whisper these four words, "I trust you, Jesus." Let me take care of you." ~ Jade's devotional (Jesus Calling for kids)
"Don't despair today when you can't see it. Obey God and trust that He is working. His timing is so rarely house, but it is always perfect. Instead of chaffing under the seemingly mundane, embrace each task as a building block for the dreams in your heart. Don't give up home. I promise.... it's coming." ~ Proverbs 31 Ministry's author Amy Carroll
His answer is not the one I wanted. Of course we live in society that demands instant gratification, and as a pathetic human sometimes I would like to put my God in a box and apply this part of our culture to His personality. Praise the Lord!!! My God is so much bigger than my society. He knows what is best, and though it hurts worse than I could ever imagine anything... His answer is this:
"Hang On. Don't give up. Don't quit. Keep pressing on."
"So let's not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good. At the right time we will harvest a good crop if we don't give up, or quit." Galatians 6:9 The Message
And by the way, just so you know... I have applied this answer to my blogging issue as well. :) Obviously.
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